Pure Illusion (Web Of Deception #1) Read online

“It’s okay, baby. Just breathe.”

  I throw my arms around his middle, nuzzling closer. “It hurts to breathe. I’m so tired. I’m not strong enough to make it. Let me go.”

  He squeezes me tighter. “I can’t do that, Isabel.”

  “Please let me go,” I mumble through my rapid tears. “He’s right. I can’t hold on anymore.”

  “You hold on to me. I’m right here. Don’t you dare give up, Isabel. Do you hear me? Hold on when everything else fails.”

  “But I can’t,” I sob, the powerful wail rattling my chest and shaking my shoulders.

  “You can. You have to.” He places a hand under my chin and tips my head back. I open my eyes, flicking the tears from my thick lashes. Opening my eyes is the wrong thing to do because I’m flooded with Hunter’s devastatingly handsome face. Strong jaw line, pink kissable lips that are a little too full, a straight nose, and vivid blue eyes I can practically drown in.

  The beauty that is him leaves me stunned.

  “You can do it. I know you can. You’re strong,” he declares. Then he tucks my body into his left side, engulfing me completely. “What are you, Isabel?”

  “A suicidal loser,” I sob.

  He growls and squeezes the air from me. “Wrong. What are you, Isabel?”

  “Please, I’m tired, Hunter.”

  “What are you, Isabel?”

  “I’m sleepy.”

  His tight grip turns into a deathtrap vice. “What are you, Isabel?”

  “You’re hurting me, Hunter,” I whisper, my tears finally coming to an end as a new wave of terror takes over.

  “What. Are. You.” The pressure from his steely arms is crushing my ribs. He doesn’t loosen his grasp on my body, not one inch.

  I rarely see this aggressive, scary side of Hunter up close and personal anymore; years ago, after he cut me from his life, he always kept me at safe a distance. I know he has a temper, hell, everyone knows he has a temper from the numerous bloody fights he was involved in throughout high school. Hunter’s temper has gotten better with age, but I think he’s trying to control it. His fighting hasn’t stop, it only slowed.

  We attend the same school and are both in our junior year of college. I left UNCG early to deal. Winter break is approaching. Everyone will back home and soon they’ll all know I tried to off myself. I don’t think I have the courage to face them all again.

  He drops an arm from around me, his hand fists harshly in my hair, tugging it by the roots, forcing my head back so he can look at my face. Petrified and extremely aroused, I stare into his heated eyes, at a loss for words.

  Unbelievable.

  Those eyes get me every time.

  How could anything be so purely blue?

  As blue as the purest water in the world, as blue as a cloudless sky.

  “What are you, Isabel?”

  Feeling something flicker alive inside me, I lick my dry lips to answer, but before I do, his gaze drops to my mouth and darkens instantly. “I am strong?”

  His eyes gradually shift back to mine in such a lazy way it makes my head swim and, when they do, the emotion and turbulent storm within them leaves me breathless. But I can’t quite comprehend the intense emotion there.

  Frustration?

  Annoyance?

  Hunger?

  “Yeah, you’re strong—” his jaw clenches “—and pretty. So stop saying shitty things before I lose my fucking mind.” He leans in close, so close I feel his sweet breath wash over my lips and cheeks. “And you don’t want me to lose my mind, Isabel. There’s no telling what I’ll do. You have no idea what I’m capable of anymore.”

  A whiny, needy sound slides out my throat.

  Did I just moan?

  Yep!

  I think I just moaned.

  I moaned peering right into Hunter’s blue eyes. His lips hover above mine and his hand is firmly knotted at the back of my head in my hair.

  He smiles widely in return, eliciting another throaty moan.

  His golden brows pull together, then he inclines really close.

  Oh.

  My.

  God.

  He’s going to kiss me.

  Yes!

  Yes!

  Yes!

  Kiss me.

  Kiss me, please.

  Feeling a like a Disney princess about to be kissed by her true love, I shut my eyes and pucker my lips. The heat from his body bathes mine; I suck up as much of his scent that my lungs can hold, leaving me highly intoxicated. It’s like I’m huffing paint, unable and incapable of stopping. His lips kiss the tip of my nose lightly and then he sags back against the pillows, chuckling softly.

  I open my eyes, dazed and glaring.

  I’m such an idiot.

  “Were you expecting more, Isabel?”

  “No,” I lie, cheeks flaming red.

  Asshole.

  “Liar,” he taunts. “You want me to kiss you?”

  “No.”

  “You want me to fuck you?”

  “No.”

  Yes!

  “You want me to lick your pussy?”

  Fuck yes!

  “No,” I mumble, barely audible, hiding my face in the fabric of his black cotton shirt.

  Hunter gives me a tight squeeze and tsks disappointedly. “I would’ve done all three and more, if you told the truth, Isabel. Now, you have to settle with sleeping next me instead of me sleeping inside of you.”

  I release a ragged breath, kind of pissed at myself.

  He would’ve done all three and more?!

  My breathing quickens. Suddenly, I lose my common sense and forget how to inhale, to exhale, to do anything.

  I’m hyperventilating.

  “Jesus, Isabel. Breathe,” Hunter orders, shifting on top of me. “Christ, you’re freaking out.”

  I am freaking out.

  I’m practically naked—I’m only in my underwear—in bed with the only boy I have ever loved in way it made me feel deranged.

  He’s so beautiful up close, every inch of him.

  I can’t think.

  I can’t move.

  I can’t breathe.

  I can’t function.

  He bends his head and thick waves of blond hair come crashing down all around me. He’s staring directly into my eyes, down into the deepest depths of my soul. “I think you’re going into shock.”

  Bewildered by the turn of events and even my own body’s greedy needs, I nod, agreeing to anything he says.

  “Can you breathe for me, Isabel?”

  I nod, still unable to do anything but gaze helplessly into his eyes like a bimbo idiot.

  “You can start by opening your mouth.”

  Doing as I’m told my lips part almost immediately.

  He moves further to my mouth, face seriously sexy and eerily focused. “Wider,” he commands.

  Feeling his heat roast my skin, I close my eyes and open my mouth wider. Then the sweet wetness of the tip of his tongue darts into my mouth, leaving me shaking and tingly all over. His tongue flicks mine and glides over the roof of my mouth and then it’s gone.

  I suck in as much air as my lungs can hold and, oddly, I feel better.

  “I see that did the trick,” Hunter smugly gloats, lying back down, tucking me into his side. “Still tired?”

  I nod silently against his warm, hard, fragrant chest.

  Arrogant bastard.

  “Get some rest, then.”

  Chapter three

  Nonexistent

  The next three days are a blur. Besides crying and sleeping, I don’t do much of anything. Hunter feeds me between naps and sobs. I’m unsure about him. I mean, after all these years, what does he want from me? What is his ulterior motive? Hunter Knight and I were best friends since I was six and he was seven, but when we reached high school everything changed. It was like I became this slimy grotesque creature with eight legs.

  We quit hanging out. He never stopped to say hello. He didn’t even look my way whenever we were in the
same space. He completely cut me out of his life without giving me any kind of warning or explanation. There were many times where I’d walk up to him at school and he’d be at his locker. I’d stand in front of him, nervous and sweaty, unsure about what to say and he’d ignore me entirely, like was invisible.

  I wish I were invisible because the rumors started shortly after. Everyone thought I was this deranged stalker, madly obsessed about Hunter Knight. I would’ve been okay with that, but hearing him not fend off or care about the rumors hurt in a different way; to grasp and acknowledge the fact that Hunter didn’t care about me at all was more painful to actually witness. I still remember it as clear as day.

  ***

  Isabel age fifteen

  Hunter age sixteen

  It’s the end of our freshmen year and I’m in the girls’ restroom at Cherry High, hiding until lunch period is over. The girls’ bathrooms are the best place to get absolute privacy. I would know; that’s where I hide every day at lunch to escape everybody and everything. Hunter, Max, Jake, and Falcon all rush into the bathroom, unaware I’m in the last stall reading It by Steven King.

  Flooded by a wave of panic, I can’t distinguish the voices from one another. After my heart rate slows and my breaths even, I peer out the tiny sliver of an opening where the corners of the stalls meet and start to listen intently. They are all huddled in a semicircle and talking about the girls they’re having sex with, until Max brings up my name. “So what’s up with Isabel?”

  “Yeah? She’s the quiet nerdy type,” Jake adds.

  “Except nerds don’t look like exotic Victoria Secret models,” Falcon interjects. “Mexican, black and white makes a good mix.”

  Hunter scuffs. He’s either amused or annoyed. I can’t tell which.

  “Easy Falcon, that’s Hunter’s girl. He has first dibs,” Max teases. “Just know I’m next in line. Sloppy seconds aren’t too bad.”

  “I don’t even know why we’re talking about this shit. She doesn’t exist for me and she shouldn’t exist for none of you either. The next time any one of you fuckers say her name, I’ll fucking lose it. I’m not kidding,” Hunter growls.

  The sudden fierce ache in my chest makes me wince. I drop my book, sinking to my knees, staring at the dirty blue tile floor beneath them. The pain that strikes me is so strong; it feels like every facet of my being is being ripped apart.

  He’s killing me and he doesn’t even care.

  “So she’s nothing? You’re giving me your blessing to fuck your nerdy, pretty nonexistent girlfriend? ”Max taunts, laughing.

  I hear Hunter grunt and then a horrible crunching noise afterwards.

  “FUCK!” Max yells.

  “Bro, I think you broke his fucking nose,” Jake shrieks.

  Leaning forward, I press my forehead to the small opening and continue to watch.

  “It’s broken alright,” chuckles Falcon.

  Max holds his nose with both hands. His nose is leaking a bloody river that flows over his lips. “Fuck you, Hunter and fuck you, too, Falcon. You’re both dead to me,” Max mutters angrily before storming out the door.

  Jake follows, shaking his head.

  This is not good, Max is a junior and he’s already the caption of the varsity football team. Hunter, Falcon, and Jake are all still freshman, but they are on the varsity team as well. The football team, Lions, rules the school and the entire town. Being on the football team means you are a Hero, you are the one exception to every rule and law. Everyone in town worships the players. Max can end that for Hunter and Falcon, if he wanted. That’s the power Max has over them, that’s the influence Max is gifted with.

  “I think you went a little overboard, Hunter,” cautions Falcon.

  “She doesn’t exist,” Hunter mumbles, as if in some kind of trance. He absently looks at his bloody fist without an ounce of remorse and then dashes out the door.

  A small sob slides out my throat.

  Falcon’s brows snap together and he tilts his head to the side and starts to walk in my direction. Using the backs of my hands, I scuttle away from the door and hide in the tight corner of the stall, pressed between the wall and the toilet. Falcon’s black boots come into view as he stands in front of the door. “Who’s in there?”

  I say nothing.

  “I won’t hurt you.”

  I don’t reply.

  “You sound like you’re crying. I just want to make sure you’re okay.”

  Nothing.

  “Look, there’s enough space for me to slide up under the door. I really don’t wanna do that. The floor is pretty gross. So just tell me you’re fine and I’ll leave. I promise.”

  I open my mouth but nothing comes out.

  I am not fine.

  I am dying.

  I am alone and dying.

  Alone because no matter if I was in a crowded room no one would matter, Hunter was the only one that counted. Dying because he said I meant nothing, therefore I am nothing. I don’t exist to him. He was the reason I wanted to smile.

  “Fuck it,” Falcon mutters. He bends down and begins to slide under the stall door on his back. A mop of thick brown hair pops into the rectangle of space. His big hands grip the bottom edges of the door to push his athletic body forward. Once he is fully inside the small area, he stands and dusts the palms of his hands on his jeans and turns to face me.

  His face falls instantly. “Shit, Isabel. I didn’t—” he shoves his hands harshly through his hair and sighs “—we didn’t know you were in here. I’m sorry. You shouldn’t have heard any of that.”

  It’s too late, of course.

  I heard everything.

  I’m so absorbed in my tears that I don’t respond.

  I don’t care to respond.

  I want him to go away and let me die in peace.

  He’s very gorgeous, as attractive as Hunter.

  But he doesn’t grant me that luxury, though.

  He stays and holds me while I cry.

  He lulls me into a warm place where I can finally say something.

  I tip my head back and ask, “Why does it hurt so much?”

  His beautiful brown eyes drop to my face and replies, “The pain was always there, you just never felt it until now.”

  Chapter four

  Not Quite Good Enough

  Sore and drowsy and disorientated, my eyelids slowly flutter open. The room is dark, except for the soft light of the TV. I’m still in Hunter’s bed, wrapped in a bundle of sheets. I’m so warm and comfortable, cozier than I have the right to be.

  Hunter’s hand lovingly sifts through my hair while his other one feeds a slice of meaty pizza to his mouth. His eyes are glued to the TV, the cool glow highlighting his flawlessly handsome face. But the television is muted.

  Amazed and fascinated at watching him eat and play in my hair, I openly stare at him, completely dazed.

  He snorts, amused by something happening on the screen, and then takes a huge chunk from the pizza. Hunter chews and swallows; the muscles in his jaw and neck elegantly moving in unison. I never noticed his neck before, but damn it, he has one hell of a neck. It’s not too thin and not too thick. It’s a perfect combination between the two.

  His fingers lightly massage my scalp and a small whimper passes through my lips. Unable to turn away, I stare all wide-eyed and nervous into his eyes that drift down to me. He flashes me white teeth. All smiles. “Hey, sleepy head. Are you hungry?”

  Speechless, I only nod.

  “Thirsty too?”

  I nod again.

  The hand holding his bitten pizza comes to my mouth and he starts to feed me through woeful sobs and desperate protests. “I can’t do this, Hunter.”

  He slings the half eaten pizza in the large grease-spotted takeout box that sits wide open on the nightstand beside him. Hunter swiftly shifts between my legs, dips his head down so that his lips are just above mine.

  My sobs cease as soon as I look into his strong almost violent gaze, which is severely focuse
d on me with a weird kind of accuracy that sends goose-bumps racing down the line of my spine.

  I tightly grip the sheets underneath me and tilt my head to the side. My brows snap together, confused.

  He cocks his head, mimicking my action, the intensive, feral gleam in his eyes still present.

  My chest begins to rise and fall rapidly. The panic is building again.

  That expression.

  Those eyes.

  I’m completely overwhelmed.

  “Hunter…?”

  He slams his mouth down on mine, not allowing me to finish my sentence. Vivid colors burst behind my closed lids and an emotion as powerful as love, as irresistible as lust surges through my veins.

  My hands curl in his silky hair, instantly loving the feel.

  Oh God.

  It’s so soft and smooth.

  The tears stop only for begging to take its place. “Please,” I whisper softly.

  His chest rumbles with a deep guttural groan, and then he drags his tongue over my bottom lip. Hunter shuts his eyes and presses his forehead to mine, breathing heavily.

  I release the sheets and fist my hands in the sides of his shirt, wrapping my legs around his hips. He’s really, very hard and enormous. The heat of his erection warms me through the thin fabric of his pants. He must want this as much I as I do…or at least a little.

  I’ve wanted Hunter Knight since the third grade, since I was six and truly learned the true definition of love. It’s been so long. This all seems like an unattainable dream that I’m living. He’s been so far out of my reach, now I’m in my bra and panties in his bed.

  His hand roughly cups me between my legs. I inhale sharply and shudder against him. “I can feel you getting wet, Isabel. I can smell you, baby,” he murmurs sinisterly.

  My hands spasm in his golden hair, tugging the silky strands by the roots, and he growls, low and primal.

  “Please,” I beg, frantically. “Please, Hunter. I need you.”

  His eyelids fly open and the expression on his face changes from crazed predator to angry astonishment and disgust. He releases a frustrated sigh, then rolls off me. “I can’t.”

  My head swims with rejection, but before I can say how much I wish I hated him, my phone rings and the sound is coming from his pocket. I wouldn’t care so much that he has my phone but that ringtone is a customized one. It’s Falcon’s ringtone. After Falcon found me in the stall crying my heart out, he and I started a friendship, that friendship bloomed into more. Once Hunter knew, he cut Falcon out his life as well. Cold turkey, like he did me. Falcon and I dated all throughout high school. He was my second love but my first everything else. I gave my virginity to Falcon. I loved Falcon and still do. I decided to end things because he was going to an art college in Tokyo and I was going to University of North Carolina at Greensboro. Three weeks ago he came to Tyler’s funeral and wanted to stay with me, but I convinced him to go back to Japan. Falcon had exams and needed to get back to school, to his new life. I told him goodbye forever without ever giving him a chance to say his farewell.